Thursday, September 22, 2011

Second Campaigner Challenge

From Rachael Harrie's blog:

Write a blog post in 200 words or less, excluding the title. It can be in any format, whether flash fiction, non-fiction, humorous blog musings, poem, etc. The blog post should:
  • include the word "imago" in the title
  • include the following 4 random words: "miasma," "lacuna," "oscitate," "synchronicity,"
If you want to give yourself an added challenge (optional and included in the word count), make reference to a mirror in your post.
For those who want an even greater challenge (optional), make your post 200 words EXACTLY!
I thought this was hard, so I turned to files of old manuscripts for ideas. I searched for the key words hoping I could find something in a jiffy, and I was able to locate a poem that had miasma in it. I tweaked it by adding the other words. The full poem is much longer, so this is only a portion of it. Being that it's a fragment, I hope it makes sense. And it’s an oldie since I wrote it in ’95. Rachael picked words that made me go huh?, but this led me to a forgotten poem that I’m rather fond of. By the way, this entry is exactly 200 words.

The Twisted Imago

We sit together, tense,
Two thorns on a rotten melon.
You have a newspaper in hand,
Rolled like a club,
Coffee in the other hand
To scorch one’s head.

I sat here first on this bench
Next to the lacuna of a manhole cover,
Against the painted mural,
The dead love proclamations
Etched with a knife on the grainy wood.
The commuter throng left in the last bus.
I am late and shall pay.
We are alone and I dislike your encroachment.
A miasma lingers.
You came when the last bus coughed,
A devil emerging from tendrils of smoke.
The anticipation buzzes
Under my skin
Like so much electricity.

You clear your throat,
Drink your coffee.
I see the air wave.
You hungrily oscitate and I shiver
Because you excel at taking.

We wait, the two of us crackling.
Your skin crinkles and pops
As if in an oven.
Your heat singes my hair.
My dry throat tightens.
I wait for the next bus,
But it won’t save me.
With a lack of synchronicity
There’s no rescue, life has no
Fealty towards me, the
Sun rises and falls never knowing me.
I’ve only dreamed because
I’ve allowed myself such tokens.

63 comments:

Jennifer Hillier said...

Wow! Gorgeous, gorgeous writing!

Angelina C. Hansen said...

Beautiful, Medeia. Thank you for sharing. Always happy to see the work of a fellow YA writer/poet.

David Powers King said...

Lovely. Need I say more?

I'm pressed with the amount of poetry I'm seeing this time around. My entry turned into one. Yours is brilliant!

Great job, Medeia! :)

The Golden Eagle said...

That's a great poem! :)

Beth said...

How amazing that you were able to use part of another poem! I love the ending.

Miranda Hardy said...

So glad you decided to pull this out and add it to the challenge. Interesting segment. Really enjoyed it.

Jamie McHenry said...

Not only do I like it, I'm impressed that long ago you used miasma in your writing. Well done!

Jemi Fraser said...

Lovely - and rather amazing you had even one of those words in anything at all!

storytreasury said...

Beautiful poem!

elizabethreinhardt said...

This is the second time I saw this challenge today! Awesome! Amazing how each entry was so gorgeous but so different!

Jen said...

That is beautiful! I'm in awe of people who can write poetry, and yours flows perfectly.
Mine is #3.

Susan Fields said...

I love the poem! I did Rachael's last campaign and I loved the challenges - you did a great job with this one!

Stephen Tremp said...

I like the sun rises and falls never knowing me. Powerful. Sad. almost depressing. But well written!

Angela Brown said...

The beauty leaps from this poem with grace and by design. I really enjoyed it.

Suze said...

I think I may have to read this a number of times before it really sinks in.

StephanieD said...

What ominous imagery you've conjured here. "thorns on a rotten melon" "a devil emerging from tendrils of smoke" - This bears multiple re-reads.

bridgetstraub.com said...

I could never have pulled off a poem. mine is #29

Elaine AM Smith said...

How beautiful - very emotive considering the words you had to squeeze in there.

Paul Greci said...

Great internal imagery! And, I love that it all takes place on a bus stop bench.

Angie Cothran said...

So beautiful :) I love the poetic take!

Tara Tyler said...

deeply felt poem. well done!

Joanna said...

This is my favorite so far! I'm thinking of doing a poem too. We shall see. Off to vote!

Sarah Pearson said...

So beautiful, and so melancholy.

nutschell said...

beautiful poem, medeia! And amazing how it turned out to be exactly 200 words!
nutschell
www.thewritingnut.com

LadyJai said...

Wow! Just wow! Beautifully written, and seriously?! you had something you wrote a long time ago with the word "miasma" in it?! Good job!

Nadja Notariani said...

Absolutely beautiful in wording and continuity, Medeia.
...'two thorns on a rotten melon'.... -
loved this imagery - the double swipe at each personality. I also appreciated that your poem lacked blame ...only offering saddened observations. Quite nice. ~ Nadja

Cortney said...

Beautiful writing! And congrats on your book!

Meredith said...

Wow! You had to use some strange words, but that poem is gorgeous!

F.E. Sewell said...

Beautiful writing! I'm a sucker or poems any day. Great job1

Old Kitty said...

Great use of these fab words - love how this powerful and multilayered scene is set with coffee on a bench by a bus stop! Take care
x

Lady Gwen said...

Beautiful, Medeia! So evocative and eloquently put. Nice job meeting the challenge! I'm #34.

CherylAnne Ham said...

Absolutely beautiful.

Marcia said...

I think it's great how this challenge made you go back to something you'd previously written. Very nice.

Dawn M. Hamsher said...

I enjoyed your poem and use of words.

The Write Soil

Mine is #50.

Deniz Bevan said...

Love the imagery here Medeia. Very evocative on the heat, the smells, the tension...

Anne Spollen said...

This is great! Not sure how you used those words to make this so readable, but you did - nice!

Medeia Sharif said...

Thanks for the wonderful comments, everyone. I'm glad you enjoyed my poem. I'll be visiting your blogs soon.

Lorelei said...

This is an excellent poem. So glad you shared it with us!

Ron Smith said...

Fealty...one of my favorite words.

This must have been tough. Poetry seems as if it would be harder to round off the words to 200.

You did a great job. Very evocative.

Roger Eschbacher said...

Powerful and beautiful. Well done.

MC Rogerson said...

Such vivid imagery, especially the skin crackling. Fantastic.

Roland D. Yeomans said...

How clever to make this entry a poem. Easier to tell a coherent story in a long poem rather than a short snippet. And you did it masterfully, too, Roland

Christine Rains said...

Great imagery in a beautiful poem. Good job!

Melodie Wright said...

Wow - loved this!
And can't wait to read your debut. It's on my TBR pile. Congrats!

Myne Whitman said...

You did a great job with this poem.

Susie Medwell said...

This is great, a really haunting evocative read.

Zan Marie said...

Wow! I wrote a poem, too. There's imagery and rhythm there that just caught my attention. Great job.

J. A. Bennett said...

Great use of prose. Love this!

Sandwiched Writer said...

Beautiful use of language and imagery! Thank you for stopping by my blog so I could see/read this.

catherinemjohnson said...

Fantastic poem!

julie fedderson said...

Just beautiful! Amazed that you can make poetry out of such difficult words.

Theresa Milstein said...

You hungrily oscitate and I shiver - favorite line!

Good job on a very difficult challenge!

Carrie Butler said...

Great work, Medeia! You're so talented. :)

raelynbarclay said...

Excellent! I'm thoroughly enjoying the poems this challenge has inspired. Hope you'll post the full poem in the near future :)

Kurt Hartwig said...

I'm always jealous of the poetry. Can't do the poetry. Very lovely use of the words.

Doreen McGettigan said...

Such a beautifully flowing poem.

catherinemjohnson said...

Beautiful, Medeia. Lisa Shroeder would be proud.

Arlee Bird said...

That was an interesting take on things. Weird that you would have already had something with "miasma" in it. I guess it was synchronicity.

Lee
Tossing It Out

Sandwiched Writer said...

Love so many of these lines ... "because you excel at taking..." Well done!

Claire said...

I am always impressed by people who write poetry as I have so little knowledge of it. Great inclusion of the words :)

Cheryl Reif said...

I LOVE this. I love poetry that tells a story, a scene, and yours does it so beautifully.

the wild magnolia said...

Good job, brilliant!

#188

Karen deBlieck said...

Beautiful writing that flows well. You did a wonderful job.

#189